Eating Sidewalk

It's time for another story.

As I have previously stated in this story, I don't have a car.  I'm not proud to say I still don't have one...but I am proud to say I'm finally upgrading to a moped scooter!!! WOO!!! It should be coming in the mail soon.

Anyway, so I don't have a car, and my roommate's bike I was using for a while got stolen, so lately my only mode of transportation is a combination of city bus and Razor scooter.  I hate my Razor scooter.  It's going to kill me.  I only ride it when I absolutely have to...like when I'm running late for work...so late, in fact, that riding a Razor scooter 3 miles to my job will actually be faster than waiting for the bus to come get me.  I also ride it if the buses aren't running (any time after 8pm).

One night I had to work until 7:45pm and my plan was to get out as soon as possible and scooter my little booty to the bus stop as fast as I could in an effort to make the transfer that would get me home.  I'm not usually pressured for time like this, but this night I was.  And of course, this also happened to be the busiest night ever and I was getting stopped by customers everywhere I turned!  I didn't manage to get out of there until well after 8 and long story short, I missed the bus and was left to scooter home.

I really really wanted to get home really really fast, because I had a Skype date with my man that I needed to get to.  So I pushed and scooted my hardest until I was cruising as fast as was humanly possible on a $25 scooter from the local Walmart.

So there I was, flying down main street, dodging pedestrians and bunny-hopping enormous sidewalk cracks (you never really notice how terrible the sidewalks in my town are until you have to ride a scooter over them) until suddenly:

Here's what happened.  If any of you readers out there are lucky enough to have ridden a Razor scooter, you'll know that the front wheel doesn't always stay in alignment with the handlebars.  Mine has been loose for a while, but it wasn't too bad so I didn't worry about it.  Apparently, it was a lot more loose than I thought, because suddenly the wheel went from this:

I found myself heading over the handlebars and flying face-first right onto the sidewalk before I could even process what was happening.  The only thing going through my brain as I flew like a rag doll through the air was:

Ok, let it be known I go over those handlebars all the time.  Usually though, I can sort of hurdle them and hit the ground running and I'm okay.

This time, everything happened way too fast.  Oddly enough, the first complete sentence I could form in my head was:

Anyway, so I hit the ground and after that ironic thought about the helmet, my next thought was, "All the traffic...must stand up right away so as not to alarm anyone."  I jumped up almost as soon as my momentum stopped.

In hindsight, I kind of wished I had just laid there for a minute or so to relax...just to see if anyone would have thought I died or something...But no, I jumped up and turned to grab my scooter and found it a whopping ten feet away from where I had landed!!!  That's quite a wipeout, if you ask me :)

And before you ask how my wounds were, this is how I imagined them as I scootered/limped the rest of the way home:

This is what I really looked like:

NOTHING!!! Not even a little bit of blood!!!  I did manage to get a little roadrash on my shoulder, though.